Time? Friends? Support? Distractions? Is it even wise to sum it up in one single word? A better question would be; Is it possible to sum it up in a single word?
Everything can be justified or simplified by adding relativity so there is always room for ‘ifs’. What I was trying to figure out, was the path that we unconsciously choose to heal minds. Trying to do something to heal your mind is, in my opinion, even more hurtful. The thought that made you sad or lost is generally a single thought rather than a chain of thoughts. It is astonishing to see the amount of damage that a single thought can inflict unintentionally.
But, again, no one can define what you must hold on to and what you must let go of. Who knows, letting go of the pain might turn out to be even more painful, dissolving all your efforts into nothingness.
Everything negative that happened to me, when it comes to relationships and people, has mostly been reversible so far. It’s a date with reality when you encounter something irreversible. It took me more than a month to come to terms with the fact that I lost someone. And all of a sudden all the things I used to scoff at became priceless.
Most things that I have been doing lately have become some form of entertainment. I can’t seem to focus. My scatter-brain is even more scattered.
Let’s chalk all these things down to ‘excuses’ for once. Because we need to find, if not good, a satisfactory solution.
I was in Thailand, learning kung fu when I got to know. It helps to be in a positive environment. It sucks because you can’t communicate. When I finally shared it with a friend, it felt like I could breathe again.
I believe what I really need to heal is, the peace of mind to accept what happened, to separate anger from sadness, to be in the moment and to always cherish the gem of a friend that I lost. In my opinion, it is not wise to let go. Letting go of what you feel makes you stronger, maybe, but you lose a little of your heart every time you let go. I do. So, I made the decision to retain my heart and be weak, maybe, but, definitely strong at the same time.
The taste of reality is harsh and bitter? Isn’t it?